Dear Kneaders Bakery,
I'm coming to visit you tomorrow, because I haven't been able to stop thinking about those Cream Cheese Brownies that you knocked me over with last week.
Just because I love your brownies so much doesn't mean I want you to come to my town. In fact, I DO NOT want you to open in Logan. I couldn't handle it if you did. Better if you and your brownies and your best-on-earth-and-so-crazy-that-you-only-make-it-in-the-fall pumpkin bread stay ninety minutes away from me so I don't have to "exercise integrity in the moment of choice" every day.
ps - actually, it's all about the chocolate